Saturday, September 8, 2012
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Saturday, June 26, 2010
I love the word 'allure'. The word itself captivates one and I find it holds the energy of its meaning. To be alluring is 1) to temp or entice; 2) the power of attraction, 3) to beguile. It could also mean that one has charisma or even the power to seduce or be seductive. When one is 'alluring' the subject of the allurer is under a “spell” or so it may seem.
Don’t you just love knowing that if you are a woman you have the power to beguile? In fact that is where it all began in the mythical Garden of Eden when the Snake (symbol for sexuality) beguiled Eve to eat the apple of knowledge.
The question I wish to explore here is if this is the old definition of what it means to be alluring then what could the new definition be? For women this is an important question, for ever since the ‘fall’ we women have been trying to apologize for being a woman. I believe that the time has come to reshape, reconfigure and redefine what it means to be a woman who has allure or what I call 'feminine mystique'.
It has been for literally thousands of years that we have been told that it was our ability to entice men that caused the downfall of mankind. Our innate sexuality was too hot and alluring for man to handle. And so the word allure got a bad rap and women were told that to be too sexy, too enticing or seductive was wrong. Only bad girls did that, not good girls. And even though we wanted to please our mothers and fathers we also wanted to explore our bad girl nature.
Over 30 years ago Betty Friedan wrote the book, The Feminine Mystique. It rocked the feminist world and brought awareness to the roles of women, a subject that had never been questioned. Although this book was written decades ago, many of these ideas are still prevalent in our culture today. Betty Friedan’s book exposed the roles of women in the 50’s and 60’s as well as the attitudes that accompanied them, and as such allowed us to bring to light how women were so repressed by the social standards and mores of their day.
The Tantric Woman
In Tantra the woman is always seen as the more dynamic and active partner, especially in love making, for she is the expression of Shakti the Primal Goddess. She represents raw sexuality, uncontrolled emotions. She can be fierce or gentle. She is untamable and is our primal nature, the Wild Woman. This aspect of the feminine has always scared the male population and it has also scared many women. Of course this was not always the case, especially before the demise of the Goddess. But it has been the case for the past five thousand years. And so the time has come for women to embrace this aspect of her feminine nature and to use it with love, wisdom, and reverence and to hold it sacred.
The New Feminine Mystique
The New Feminine Mystique is a new possibility for you as a woman to shift the current way in which you embody and express your sexual power, your sexual allure and your feminine sexual essence. It is a conversation that explores what it means to be a fully-embodied sexually-awake, totally integrated woman. How we as women use our power, the power of our sex and sexual allure is a question whose time has come.
The New Feminine Mystique takes the shame out being an alluring woman and redefines this age-old term. To be a woman who is alluring now can mean to be someone who has kept her passion and erotic nature alive, a woman who is inspired by her vision and who knows how to show herself in the best light. She wears her womanliness proudly and without apology. Her sexuality is appropriately expressed when it is the right time and is not used to manipulate others to get what she wants. She no longer needs to do that in order to survive. She is a woman who is virginal unto herself and knows that she can satisfy herself erotically and does not need a man to do this. Because of this she is not afraid of men and therefore can love them for being men. When a woman no longer needs a man to feel fulfilled she is then free to love them for being who they are.
With this as a guide more and more women can begin to stand tall and feel that being a sexually potent, fully impassioned and alive woman is magnificent and something to be celebrated.
We are faced with many challenges at this time in our history and it has been told by many, including the Dali Lama, that it will be through the women in North America that the world should look for its leadership. If this is true then it is up to women everywhere but most especially here in the U.S. to ask themselves if they are ready to become the women that they have always wanted to be.
For more information regarding The New Feminine Mystique please check out: www.womensmysteries.org/FeminineMystique.html and register for the free intro conference call.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
As temples were built in honor of the Goddess the responsibility of initiation was given to the temple priestesses. Some women were trained to become Temple Prostitutes, whose main role was to restore men back to wholeness after war and help them to reconnect with their soul and heart. These women would dance the dance of Shakti and be a vessel for the Goddess to come through. The personal self having stepped out of the way, She became a vehicle for the energy of the Goddess to flow through her.
In the temple of love the sacred prostitute’s primary offering to the goddess was her welcoming of the stranger, thought to be the emissary of the gods or perhaps the god incarnate. If she were a maiden, he initiated her into the mysteries of her feminine sexuality under the aegis of the goddess. Holy Whore as "a woman, who, through ritual or psychological development, has come to know the spiritual side of her sexuality, her true Eroticism, and lives this out according to her individual circumstances." (The Sacred Prostitute, Nancy Qualls-Corbett)
The Demise of Sacred Sex
Sex began to become profane with the onset of the Church's gradual annihilation of the role of the goddess and all that she represented. The sacred feminine went from holy to unholy, from sacred to profane and the sacred prostitute was drastically altered. There came a time when the goddess was no longer worshiped; the physical and spiritual aspects of the feminine were declared evil. From this point on women who represented sexuality and the goddess were also condemned by the Church Patriarchs as, “the embodiment of sensuous seduction, the reason for man’s downfall; she was tempted by evil forces and in turn tempted man.”(The Sacred Prostitute) So the act of sex was also condemned and taught that it could only be done for procreation of the species.
Sex then became profane and all natural bodily functions became gross, shameful, and not to be spoken of. As you may know, anything that is forbidden becomes a taboo, and all taboo’s are become desirable. Women are convinced over thousands of years, that having sexual desire is not a feminine quality so that any woman who desired sexual gratification must be unfeminine and a “whore”. The word 'whore' actually comes from the Hebrew root word ‘hor’ meaning dark pit or hole. The Spanish word for whore, puta, derives from the Latin term for a well, but the Latin term for grave, literally "a hole in the earth," is puticuli, meaning womb of rebirth. These terms for whore were not derogatory. The Latin term had its root in the Vedic, an early Sanskrit language, wherein the word puta is defined as pure and holy. The cave, the pit, the hole, and the bottomless black lake were metaphors for the Great Goddess. (Diana Rose Hartmann)
In Kathleen Barry's book, The Prostitution of Sexuality, she says that "sexual exploitation objectifies women by reducing them to sex; sex that incites violence against women and that reduces women to commodities for market exchange. Sexual exploitation is the foundation of women's oppression socially normalized."
I have always considered myself to be a sex positive individual and a rather open-minded woman when it comes to sex practices and all the different ways in which we humans like to "get off" or find our pleasure. As a woman who has been a sex educator and a teacher of sacred sexuality as well as a sexual healer, I have personally experienced what it means to be classified as a "sex worker" by the culture at large.
Today we see the result of these beliefs that have become normalized in our culture. Sex for the most part has become a thriving industry that makes billions of dollars yearly. Who sells these products? Women. It is a woman's body that is the commodity once again, and women, even well-paid women in the sex industry, are unconsciously supporting the system that exploits them and sex. The prostitution of sexuality is in full swing and because it is big business it is unlikely to change.
So what can you do, given that we are living in a world where sex is seen as entertainment rather than a sacred act of love. The following are a few things we can do to help shift sex from the profane back to sacred.
Open to a deeper sense of self and be willing to see the act of sex, whether it be for the sake of pleasure or love, as sacred.
Learn more about sacred sexuality, Tantra and other forms of 'high sex' which have made a comeback and continue to grow in popularity.
Educate your kids about the sacredness of love making and the sex act itself, as well as to encourage young girls to see themselves as valued for all of who they are, not just for their sexiness or beauty.
Take a stand and say 'no' to the sexploitation of teen girls and boys by the media. Join in partnership with other organizations that are in support of stopping this type of exploitation.
These are just a few ideas and I welcome any that you may have. Feel free to send in your ideas and comments.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
So today I have dropped out of the game of duality, for this moment, I am blessed and in deep gratitude for everything that has occurred over the past 5 days in my life. I know that whether I have a job or a career or a new car are not essentially important to my being fulfilled or happy. This does not mean that I don't have a hunger to share more of who I am, more of my gifts with the world and specifically with women. It just means that whether I have these things or not I am still ok, my life is still fulfilling and I can be happy. In my awakening once again to the Truth of who I Am, I remember what is really of value, what is really important and that I can just relax all of my need to have it be different.
We are all living at a time that is very tumultuous and perhaps even exciting. We may be feeling even more the uncertainty of our lives. We may be noticing that we really don't have control over everything that happens to us, in fact the paradox here is that we can only co-create our lives with All That Is, God and Goddess or whatever you choose to call the vast intelligence of the Yoniverse. We shape our lives by where we put our attention, what we think about and what we say or do. In this we are God/Goddess, but we also live in the mystery not knowing what will happen next. So it is a dance to learn how to live from both our knowingness of who we are and our surrendering to the unfolding of the mystery.
This is our challenge for those of us who have chosen the path of awakening. It requires constant vigilance and our complete commitment to serve That Which Is, call it Love, God/Goddess or the Unified Field.
I can only take each moment as it comes, be present to what is before me, and take a deep breath and relax into life. All the pushing, striving and longing to be different or have a different life will only bring you suffering if you do not accept and love all of who you are, and all of what you have created first. Then let it all go, surrender your entire life over to the Still Small Voice the Peace that is you and that you live in.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Our essential feminine power comes from our core, our sexual center, our yoni. For men it resides in the hara or dantien, the solar plexis. You see the most potent force that women have is our shakti. Our primal life force, sexual creative energy. This force resides in all of us, but for women it is what in many ways defines us.
It is this primal energy from our sex center, the second chakra, (that point just above the pelvic bone) that enables us to create life, to be both wild and untamable as well as docile, harmonious and calm. Our sexual energy is our true feminine power as it is here that the creation of life begins and the mystery of our body is held.
Our sexual energy entices, allures, fascinates, radiates and attracts both men and women. When a woman is fully emboding her sexual essence, she is her most empowered self. She walks with the grace of one who is confident, centered, serene, present, sensual and fully in her body. She is not afraid of her sexual energy or of the power this energy has over other people. She understands her power and is able to use it wisely, with compassion and integrity.
Since she no longer needs to manipulate or control with her sexual energy or survive on it, she can be authentically herself, her full embodied goddess self. She is proud of her womanliness, her yoni her breasts her hips her belly and all of her curves. She revels in her body and loves all of it no matter what shape it is.
It is from this place that she creates and offers her gifts, and it is from this place that she partners with man. A woman who is fully living in her feminine power is naturally radiant, receptive, yet strong from within herself. This woman lives in you and me and I invite you to discover her.
Please visit my site and become a member of the School of Womyn's Mysteries, http://www.womensmysteries.org .
Sunday, August 2, 2009
But Baubo can be seen as a much older symbol for the power and the energy of female sexuality. She can also be viewed as trickster figure, who with her own jokes, magic, and laughter embodies fecundity and fertility. We have no images of a clearly identifiable Baubo, but her various shapes and her memory have persisted in myth and ritual. She was neither goddess nor night demon, though at times she was claimed as such.
For you and me, Baubo can remind us to laugh whenever we become to serious and if picking up our skirts will do the trick then so be it.